Alexithymia is not being able to match the word to the feeling. While alexithymia is not an official symptom of autism, it does co-occur with it. Alexithymia has plagued me my entire life. I lost count of the times where I could not match what I was feeling with a word. Since I naturally don't think in words, this made my journey more difficult. In some sense, at times I felt defective. I have recently begun to learn it's not that I can't feel because I feel very deeply. I've begun to rely on my divinity to help me match words to feelings. My most recent achievement was finally "understanding" gratitude. I felt what I was feeling and I saw colors and shapes. I then heard from my divinity "gratitude." It was incredible! It's not that I hadn't really felt it before, but everything finally aligned so that I could fully understand. This piece shows Alexithymia as the black in this piece. The colors are what I feel and are waiting to burst through. I almost felt my journey in making and renaming this piece was the embodiment of "Alexithymia," because I couldn't find the words to accurately name it. I loved this journey!
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